The baby bump just continues to grow.... I never dreamed I would be able to take this picture, but here I am 38 weeks pregnant. There are so many things to complain about, how tired I am, how huge I feel, how bad my back and hips hurt, how I just want this little guy here. But I realized something earlier this week and it has made all the difference for me right now. Yes, I am all those things but more than that I am grateful that my body was even able to carry another baby at all. I am, gasp, 36 years old, and I really never dreamed that we would be adding another baby to our family now. That looking back this pregnancy has been so uncomplicated. It had the potential to be stress filled and hard, and while it was at times we have been greatly blessed. My heart will always hurt for what might have been, but I am so grateful for all that we have. We have had our moments like having preterm labor scares at 26 and 34 weeks. Finding out about all the crazy antibodies I have, and how they might affect this baby. And, I had to endure 20 weeks of hormone shots that were uncomfortable and made me a crazy woman at times, but without those I think we would have had a very different ending to this pregnancy and as much as I want this to be over I will take this ending to one of those....
Then there is the whole time thing, yes I want to be done and feel like I am overdue, but in reality my due date is still 2 weeks away. Just because my body has in the past had a hard time making it to the end I figured this time it would be the same way and our baby would come a little early (or a lot) but he could still come any time and be "early" If this were my first or even second baby I would not be feeling like this. Lexie was 10 days early and that was so cool at the time, now I am dying because I might have to wait that long to have our little one this time. It is all in how you look at it. Perspective. And mine has changed.
No comments:
Post a Comment